In a culture that puts time and thought into preparing to bring baby home, we spend far too little time learning how to care for ourselves and our loved ones in the postpartum time.
1. Healthy meals prepared for her. She may not have eaten for over 24 hours! After childbirth many traditional cultures consider a postpartum mom to be "cold" from the loss of blood and the energy lost in childbirth. She should consume warming foods such as soups and stews.
2. LOTS of rest. Childbirth (no matter what way) is the equivalent of running a marathon or more and rest is so important. For a minimum of 3 days ( 4-7 days are even better), she should only get out of bed to go to the restroom. Any other time should be spend caring for baby (while she's in bed) or sleeping.
3. Housekeeping and/or childcare (for older siblings) She needs at least a week or two to begin healing before returning to normal life. Her muscles and ligaments need time to shrink to pre-pregnancy size.
4. A large supply of healthy beverages brought to her. Along with foods her beverages should be warming, but for the most part should not contain caffeine. Think herbal teas, broths, etc.
5. The ability to share her birth story with others. Whether she had an amazing birth experience, a traumatic one, or anything in between, we need to talk about it. "Tell me about your birth." can be a very powerful and healing statement for a new mom. Women remember the births of their children for a lifetime.
6. Time to heal, both physically and emotionally. No matter how your baby was born, your body, mind, and spirit needs time to heal. The childbearing process isn't over when the baby is born. It takes months for your body to return to it's pre-pregnancy state. You may need to heal from a traumatic birth, a birth that didn't go as planned, or that rocking awesome birth you want to share with the world. You need time to learn how to be that two, three, or six person family. Take that time. It will never be there again.
7. Reassurance and support from those close to her. New moms need to hear that that are doing this OK, that sometimes babies cry and we don't know why, that sometimes we feel overwhelmed and as long as it passes as quickly as it comes...it's normal. That there are things she can do if it doesn't pass and that she is still loved and supported along the way.
